Cat Food Diet

A woman was enjoying a good game of golf with her girlfriends.  “Oh, no!” she suddenly exclaimed.  “Look at the time!  I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband.  He gets furious if it’s not ready at 6:00 on the dot.”

When she got home, she discovered all she had in the fridge was a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg and a can of cat food.  With no time to go to the supermarket, she opened the can of cat food, stirred in the egg and garnished it with the lettuce leaf.

She called her husband warmly, then watched in horror as he sat down to his dinner.  To her surprise, he seemed to be enjoying it.  “Darling, this is the best dinner you’ve made me in 50 years of marriage!” he said.  “You can make this for me any day.”

Needless to say, every golf day from then on, the woman made her husband the same dish.  She told her golf partners about it and they were all horrified.  “You’re going to kill him!” they exclaimed.

Two months later, her husband died.  The women were sitting around the clubhouse a week after the funeral.  “You killed him, you know,” one of them said.  “We told you that feeding him cat food every week would do him in.  You murdered your husband.”

“I didn’t kill him,” the wife stoically replied.  “He fell off the window sill while he was licking his ass.”