Grin and Bear It

A man wakes up one morning in Boulder, Colorado to find a bear on his roof.  This happens a lot in Boulder, so he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there’s an ad for “Bear Removers.”

He calls the number and the guy says he’ll be over in 30 minutes.  The bear remover arrives and gets out of his van.  He’s got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

“What are you going to do?” the homeowner asks.

“I’m going to put this ladder up against the roof,” the guy says.  “Then I’m going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go.  The bear will soon be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van.”