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Topic: If I only had a...

in Forum: Anything Goes


If I only had a...

Posted: 12/15/10 7:42am Message 1 of 5
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Duncanville, TX - USA
Joined: 11/8/2003
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Vette(s): #1-1974 L-48 4spd Cp Med Red Metallic/Black deluxe int w/AC/tilt/tele./p/w-p/b/ Am-Fm/map light National/Regional/Chapter NCRS "Top Flight" #2-1985 Bright Red/Carmine Cp.L-98/auto Member: NCRS, NCRS Texas, Corvette Legends of Texas
A guy is walking the strip in Las Vegas and a fantastic-looking Vegas hooker catches his eye.

 
He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the hooker,
"How much do you charge?"

 
The Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."
 
 
The guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Holy crap!
No hand-job is worth that kind of money!"
 
 
The hooker says, "Do you see that Denny's on the corner?"
 
 
"Yes."
 
 
"Do you see the Denny's about a block further down?"
 
 
"Yes."
 
 
"And beyond that, do you see that third Denny's?"
 
 
"Yes."
 
 
"Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those.
And I own them because I give a hand-job that's worth $500."
 
 
So the guy says, "What the h.ell? You only live once. I'll give it a try."
 
 
They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing that he has just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500.
 
 
He is so amazed, he says, "I suppose a blow-job is $1,000?"
 
 
The hooker replies, "$1,500."

 
"I wouldn't pay that for a blow-job!"
 
 
The hooker replies, "Step over here to the window, big boy.. Do you see that casino just across the street? I own that casino outright.. And I own it because I give a blow-job that's worth every cent of $1,500."
 
 
The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific hand-job, decides to put off the new car for another year or so and says, "Sign me up.."

 
Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more amazed than before.
 
 
He can scarcely believe it but he feels he truly got his money's worth.
 
 
He decides to dip into the retirement savings for one glorious and unforgettable experience.
 
 
He asks the hooker, "How much for some puss.y?"
 
 
The hooker says, "Come over here to the window, I want to show you something.
 
 
Do you see how the whole city of Las Vegas is laid out before us: All those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and shows?   
 
 
"Dam.n!" the guy says, in awe, "You own the whole city?"
 
 
No," the hooker replies, "but I would...... If I had a puss.y."


 

Adams' Apple2010-12-15 07:44:19


Joel Adams
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If I only had a...

Posted: 12/15/10 1:57pm Message 2 of 5
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Wichita, KS - USA
Joined: 11/10/2003
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Vette(s): 2005 Daytona Sunset Orange Metallic Coupe --------------------- Sold 1974 T-top, 4 spd to BillKS
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If I only had a...

Posted: 12/15/10 4:11pm Message 3 of 5
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Sykesville, MD - USA
Joined: 4/27/2008
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Vette(s): 1979 Corvette Coupe Corvette Light Blue Midnight Blue interior Mirrored Glass T-tops
Once again, you draw me in and then slam the door in my face! I fall for it every time!
 
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If I only had a...

Posted: 12/15/10 7:40pm Message 4 of 5
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York, PA - USA
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Vette(s): 1969 daytona conv. all original 350 350 380 4 sp w/air..and hard top
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Re: If I only had a...

Posted: 9/25/11 4:50am Message 5 of 5
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Yuck, Yuck and double Yuck............hate when that happens..........yuck! 


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in Forum: Anything Goes


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