Positive Attitude The hospital room clock said 11:15 when he regained consciousness, though he couldn’t tell if it was nearly noon or late at night. He felt the dull throb of drug-deadened pain, with tubes up his nose and wires monitoring every function.  The only plus was the gorgeous nurse hovering over him. He’d obviously been in a serious accident. The nurse looked straight into the eyes. “You may not feel anything from the waist down,” she said. “I understand,” he said. “May I feel your breasts, then?”

Man!.............that's exactly what I would have said. When I got blown up in 1979 and was in the burn unit for many weeks I was told that I would be going home in a few days. Daily I received wirlpool baths to debraid the burned flesh, but I now had to learn how to take a shower and wash myself. The Nurse in charge told me that Sandy was going to wash my back............I checked out Sandy...........and said........."It's a deal if I can wash Sandy's front" All the nurses were laughing but Sandy. Man!  

Ok, Larry, finish the story... did you get to wash her front????     

Actually No.............The "Head"........(got that?) Nurse said that Sandy if kinda flat and that I might be better off washing her shoulder blades in her back..............

Man! I have so many stories about the burn unit. When I arrived the quickly stot me with lots of morphine.........great stuff! My face was totally black and most of my hair was burned. My chest and both hands were burned. I was working on 480 3 phase power..........Hot. The actual power was 500 volts acording to my meter. The guy that I was working with told me I was nuts. I told yes I am nuts........so go stand about 15 feet away in case I get blown up. I told him then he could pick up what was left of me to take home to my wife. I was done working on all three phases and attemping to re-install an arc shield. As I was doing that I heard the blast. My thoughts were that............this is the end.....

I got blown away from where  I was working and all the power to the 8 story building was knocked out. I heard my partner calling to me. He wanted to know if I was ok.........I said yeah I'm fine........how are you? I didn't want to tell that I couldn't see or feel my hands of much of my face. He said that he had to get me to the hospital but that all the wiring was on fire. I told him where a fire extiguisher was and that he must get the fire out first.

He got the fire out and we had to run down 9 flights of stairs to the ground level. Everyone in building heard the blast and were scrambling around do to the loss of power. the people freaked out when the saw me. My one hand was just red raw meat.

After the morphine in the burn unit the head doctor finally showed up after many of his staff had already been checking me out. He started with my left hand (raw meat). I quickly pulled my hand away from him. I told him that I came there for a sex change. All the doctors but him were hawling with laughter........except him.

He wanted to know what drugs they gave me. He then asked why the sex change..........

I told him that the previous week's paper mentioned tha there had been three sex changes performed there at taxpayers expenses. I asked him if they maybe swapped parts from the two guys that became females to the female who was changed to a male.

He said yes they were transformed there but it's wasn't something the talk about. He then asked if I would now let him work on my burns

Later on when I had to go into surgery, the docs were all mentioning about the sex change. I told them to just focus on my hands and face........everything else was just fine. As they were feeding me sodium penathal we were all exchanging sex change jokes.

I was very notorious for my antics................I could go on and on about this whole experience...in fact they even had a camera crew come in a did a story on my from the local tv station. Ironically I did the HVAC for that station. They wanted to show me all the film footage but I told them that I couldn't bear to see it.

WAS?!?!?

Man............all that I can say.............is, "ebo taught me everything"...........

There was a beautiful girl (Tammy) about 22 who was burned from the waist down from a car fire. Her father was a very strict minister. Anyhow, many times the nurses would tell me that I could go in for my whirlpool bath.............and there she was beautfully exposed from the waist up.....Wow........the nurses liked me and wanted to treat me........Wow nice hoots.  

When I got out I got to see Tammy at the burn clinic. When you first get out you have to go back daily for treatments...........well I bumped into Tammy with her minister father. She jumped up to greet me as I arrived............I looked at her staring up and down then said " Gee Tammy I didn't quite recognize you, with your clothes on!" Wow you should have see her father's face......Yikes!

Getting to see Tammy and having the widows fixed closed kept me from jumping out of the 11th floor tower. A shrink would come in daily to check everyone out.........they know that you get pretty depressed..............I would always lie and tell him that I was fine.......(yeah,but not really) I was so depressed that sometimes when my wife would visit, I couldn't even talk to her.

Another time, upon my arrival.......they told me that they don't baby burn victims.........they brought food for me and told me to eat with my own hands.......my hands were burned......so I stuck my face into the plate.......well they then helped me eat............Man!