Top Ten Reasons Why Trick or Treating is Better than Sex: 

10. You're guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack. 

9.  If you get tired, you can wait ten minutes and go at it again. 

8.  The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.

7.  You don't have to compliment the person who gives you the candy.

6.  If you don't get what you want, you can always try another

neighborhood. 

5.  40 years from now, you'll still enjoy candy.

4.  You can swap with your friends.

3.  It doesn't matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning. 

2.  No one expects you to hang around after you've gotten your candy.

1.  You can do the whole neighborhood!