Glad to hear that you have a strong faith, but lets put that aside and think about this reasonably.

To do so you must void yourself of all emotion and think about this from a logical side and do some statistical based decision making.

Things you need to think about.

Age - How old are you?  You’re not even out of college.  I was engaged to my first wife through college.  Looking back I should have not be staked down in college and got out and experienced college life a little more.  We marry after graduation, seven years later (seven year itch they call it) she had an affair.  Remarried age 31, Life is grand and she loves cars.  What should you take away from this and I’m sure that you will find this information on Dr. Phil and other counseling sights.  Grow up and get some maturity under your belt.  You’re more likely to know what you want in a mate and out of life once you have experienced more.  So don't be in such a rush.

Gut Check - All emotion aside what is your gut telling you?  This is a tough one, because your emotions are controlling your soul.  And everyone has a selfish side.  You say that you want things to be the way they use to be, that’s being selfish.  Look Selfishness up in the bible.  It’s a proponent of Satan that usually creates more chaos then blissfulness.  This usually is the attitude of: "I have to have it or I need it because without it my life would be miserable or not complete."  This sentence has gotten so many into so much trouble for so long that you need to ask yourself.  "Will I seriously die or my life is ruined if I don't get my way".

Maturity - Why do you think she cheated?  Did she give you the typical answer, it just happened?  It takes two ya know and if her faith is as strong as you make it out to be then it would have never happened, as sex out of wed lock is a sin.  That aside if she gave you the answer, “it just happened”, it happened because of maturity.  Most people at that stage of their life are not mature enough to control hormones or emotions.  Plus in reality she probably is like most she wants to experience more of life before being tied down.  That’s why it really happened, but she is too afraid of hurting you and telling you that she is not ready for a heavy commitment.  Plus there might be outside factors weighing in like her girl friends going out and having fun with local boys while your 900 miles in the background.

My suggestion and its the painful one...... don't be selfish, let her go, go to college, grow up some, experience life, keep the faith, learn what true faith is about, and live your life.  God has a plan for your life, which does not mean he is going to manage every little facet of it, some of that comes from your inner faith and knowledge of his readings.  So be a good steward.

Ultimately its your decision, but hopefully I gave you some things to think about.

The two of you in cousuling during her visit might help with both of your decisions.

After Shark is right about college and having a serious relationship. I graduated from an engineering program some 23 years ago. Knowing what I know now about marriage, I am glad that was not part of the equation during school. Serious relationships and marriage takes work, which will pull you from your studies if you want that relationship to work. Right now your focus should be school (I am assuming you still have a few years to go), and if you do have free time spend it enjoying the campus life with your friends. There will be plenty of time after college to start your life with that special lady. I was 29 before I got married and this gave me time to settle down and find my direction. If I had married in my early 20's I don't think I would still be married today. I also was not a Christian then, which may have something to do with it.

To sum it up, just take your time and enjoy the college life.

Ever heard the song by garth Brooks "Thank God for unanswered prayers"? If not, listen to it. I'm 35, I was engaged once, she cheated and I showed her the door. Then I met my wife, completely faithful after 10 years of marriage. Best advice I can give, if she cheated once, she'll do it again. broken heart is short term, marriage is long term. If she cheats again and after you're married and have kids, it could be very costly. I told my wife when we got serious that if she cheated it would be over. If you forgive this time, you're almost giving permission for the next time. Also, now the trust is gone and she's 900 miles away, whose to say it didn't happen before and it won't continue? (kinda hard to check up on someone 900 miles away).    

Matt 

Run! OH6A38590.7660185185

M.J., I feel for you, bro.
I have to be honest, and this is just my opinion, but life is too short to worry about "What ifs". I am also of the opinion that if this person has betrayed you once, ther's no reason to believe it won't happen again. And, as Daytona69 says, "You may forgive, but you'll never forget".
I also know that people can change. The real issue is, are you willing to stake the rest of your life on what may or may not happen? AfterShark has the right idea. You're young, and have (hopfully) a lot of life before you. This may not be "The One", but how do you know?
You really have to search in your own heart, and determine if you're sure about a relationship with this person.
I was 35 when I got married. I knew my wife for about 5 years before she told me we were getting married. I had dated & "loved" many women that were "The One", but was never as happy with any of them as I am with the one I married. Yes, I've had my heart ripped out a few times, and a few times I didn't give a crap. The bottom line is, when I stopped looking for "The One", my God sent her to me.
Best of luck to you, my friend, and I hope your God gives you the strength & knowledge to get you through this test.

OH6A gives the best advise-RUN. Daytona69 and Greypoupon69 give the multiple reasons why, primarily you will not forget even if you can forgive. I can only speak from my own experience. I went through the exact thing many years ago and I can vividly remember how irrational I was because I could not reason. Every thought I had was solely based .
on emotion. You can not make good decisions when you are driven by emotion. These folks hit it right on the money. You are young with lots of life ahead of you. Keep your head high. Let some time go by. Everything will work out for you. One good thing about aging is the experience and wisdom one gains along the way. It's a long journey. Enjoy the drive

meh.  this is so screwed up.  On one side, I know you guys are right, and on the other I'm still confused.  she seems honestly regretful of what she did, and now there's more times where she sounds affectionate toward me...she called me baby on the phone last night, without thinking about it apparently, and there was a few moments of awkward silence.  she says if we do try the relationship again, she wants to start from as close to the beginning as we can, and go real slow.  at the same time...even the guy she cheated with told her yesterday..."he sounds like he genuinely cares about you.  you should take the second chance he's offering, and if it becomes too hard, move out to him."  I'm still very unsure what to do, and she has really started to struggle with her faith. grr.  september approaches.  zero hour!  I guess all I'm really left with is seeing how things go after her plane touches down, but that doesn't help ease my anxiety in the time between now and then.

 

also, I hope I didn't offend anyone asking for specifically "christian" advice.  I'll take and appreciate any advice I can get on this matter...I was just thinking I needed some spiritual guidance.

CorvetteRacer197038591.0375115741

BOLOGNA!  Run fast.

One thing that bothered me with what you wrote:

"had sex with some random guy" 

 Cheating with someone you know, thats bad, but Random? hmmm. Run for the hills.  This was worse than just cheating, where she may have had a backround with a guy and slipped (i have forgiven my wife of 27 years for  that).  This (forgive me everybody, just my opinion) is more slutty than that.  With aids, herpes, ect. ect. ect, this puts her and your lifetime at risk, thus is much more serious.

Giant mistake...she shouldn't even be coming down to see you. The fact that she is talking about how she cheated on you with the guy she did it with is another major league RED FLAG! Chances are she is still sleeping with him. How "random" could he really be if she is discussing her personal life with him?

End it now...all you will be doing is prolonging your misery if you don't. Daytona6938591.3432060185