Dogs v. Wives

1. The later you are, the more excited your dog is to see you.

2. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave things on the floor.

4. Dogs’ parents never visit.

5. You never have to wait for a dog; they’re ready to go, instantly, 24 hours a day.

6. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

7. Dogs won’t wake you up at night to ask, “If I died, would you get another dog?”

8. Dogs never tell you to stop scratching your balls.  Instead, they sit and ponder why you don’t lick them.

9. If a dog smells another dog on you, it won’t kick you in the crotch; it just finds it interesting.