Home page
SPONSOR AD SPONSOR AD

Topic: Drafting Geezers!

in Forum: Humor


Drafting Geezers!

Posted: 4/4/09 2:52pm Message 1 of 4
Profile Pic
Lifetime MemberLifetime Member
Send PM
Joined: 7/2/2006
Posts: 8205

Drafting Guys over 60

----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier----

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down
terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the
whole thing a$$-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight,
they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military
unit until you're at least 35.

For starters:
Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only
think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a
dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We
are impatient and maybe letting us kill some icehole that desperately
deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always
get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and
can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some
fanatical s-of-a-b......

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put
them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and
yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation
for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the
house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat
and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor
did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training..

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never
seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't
figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back
of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more
about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last
thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts
with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are
already behind them.

***How about recruiting Women over 50 ...with PMS !!!
You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!

If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the
first night!

Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so they can
read it.



 

 



 

 

corvette440hp2009-04-04 14:54:53


corvette440hp
SPONSOR AD:: (Our Sponsors help support C3VR)

Drafting Geezers!

Posted: 4/5/09 6:19pm Message 2 of 4
Profile Pic
Lifetime MemberLifetime Member
Send PM
Wichita, KS - USA
Joined: 11/10/2003
Posts: 6859
Vette(s): 2005 Daytona Sunset Orange Metallic Coupe --------------------- Sold 1974 T-top, 4 spd to BillKS
Well, Larry, I'm ready to go if you are... it's not like we have a lot to do now that we're retired.  Wink  We'd get that bin Laden and be back home in time for supper.   Rolling On The Floor Laughing 
 
Larry



   C3VR Lifetime Member #102                   
    My Link.........          
 
                     
The difference between men and boys is the cost of their toys!!              

Drafting Geezers!

Posted: 4/6/09 9:29am Message 3 of 4
Profile Pic
Lifetime MemberLifetime Member
Send PM
Joined: 7/2/2006
Posts: 8205
Brother LarryThumbs Up..........where do we sign up?...........I'm with you........(your other brother), Larry


corvette440hp

Drafting Geezers!

Posted: 4/9/09 6:16pm Message 4 of 4
Profile Pic
Lifetime MemberLifetime Member
Send PM
Lodi, WI - USA
Joined: 9/25/2007
Posts: 340
Vette(s): 1972 Targa Blue, T-Top, Saddle leather, 350 auto,numbers match, all original except '69 factory side exhaust. Previously owned: 1969 427, 390hp, 4sp, Riverside Gold coupe, factory side exhaust
Hey Larry, I'm an old warrior from the '60s (Viet Nam '66-'67)  You make some excellent points!!
 
On the way back from bringing bin Laden in, we could stop off the coast of Somalia and take care of those piratesWink  Let me know when you sign up...........I'll be there.
 
Dean



 
click on either image for larger view

in Forum: Humor


SPONSOR AD: (Our Sponsors help support C3VR)