Topic: For da Gun Toters...
in Forum: Humor
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The purpose of fighting is to win. There is no possible victory in defense. The sword is more important than the shield, and skill is more important than either. The final weapon is the brain. All else is supplemental.
Things to remember:
1. Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.
2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.
3. I carry a gun cause a cop is too heavy.
4. When seconds count, the cops are just minutes away.
5. A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him 'Why do carry a 45?' The Ranger responded, 'Because they don't make a 46.'
6. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity.
7. The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. 'Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?' 'No Ma'am. If were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle.'
8. Beware the man who only has one gun. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!
But wait, there's more!
I was once asked by a lady visiting if I had a gun in the house. I said I did. She said 'Well I certainly hope it isn't loaded!' To which I said, of course it is loaded, can't work without bullets!' She then asked, 'Are you that afraid of some one evil coming into your house?' My reply was, 'No not at all. I am not afraid of the house catching fire either, but I have fire extinguishers around, and they are all loaded too.'
But wait, there's still more!
USMC Rules for Gunfighting
Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.
Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Your life is expensive.
Only hits count.
If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough nor using cover correctly.
Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.)
In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on 'pucker factor' than the inherent accuracy of the gun.
Use a gun that works EVERY TIME.
Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but he should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
Flank your adversary when possible.
Watch their hands. Hands kill. ('In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them.')
The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.
Thanx, Cookie!
Adams' Apple 2008-03-11 10:31:55
Things to remember:
1. Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.
2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.
3. I carry a gun cause a cop is too heavy.
4. When seconds count, the cops are just minutes away.
5. A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him 'Why do carry a 45?' The Ranger responded, 'Because they don't make a 46.'
6. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity.
7. The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. 'Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?' 'No Ma'am. If were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle.'
8. Beware the man who only has one gun. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!
But wait, there's more!
I was once asked by a lady visiting if I had a gun in the house. I said I did. She said 'Well I certainly hope it isn't loaded!' To which I said, of course it is loaded, can't work without bullets!' She then asked, 'Are you that afraid of some one evil coming into your house?' My reply was, 'No not at all. I am not afraid of the house catching fire either, but I have fire extinguishers around, and they are all loaded too.'
But wait, there's still more!
USMC Rules for Gunfighting
Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.
Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Your life is expensive.
Only hits count.
If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough nor using cover correctly.
Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.)
In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on 'pucker factor' than the inherent accuracy of the gun.
Use a gun that works EVERY TIME.
Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but he should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
Flank your adversary when possible.
Watch their hands. Hands kill. ('In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them.')
The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.
Thanx, Cookie!

Joel Adams
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OUTSTANDING!!!!
<not relevant>
JimG 2008-03-11 13:57:47
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An addendum...
Why do marines teach their people to shoot at 600meters?
Because the more you kill at a distance the less there are to contend with when they get to your position.
Always shoot the ones in the rear first so the ones in front continue to become easier targets.
When they get too close, you shoot the ones in front so the rest will stop and hesitate. Stationary targets are always easier to hit. Repeat process until no targets remain standing.
Should their accuracy begin to get close, call in bigger guns (or close air support) on their position and repeat the process until no targets remain standing.
Always understand that if you die were splitting up your gear so keep it clean
and orderly.
When in doubt on what to bring, bring water, guns, ammo and grenades everything else you'll need will be lying around after the first five minutes.
Why do marines teach their people to shoot at 600meters?
Because the more you kill at a distance the less there are to contend with when they get to your position.
Always shoot the ones in the rear first so the ones in front continue to become easier targets.
When they get too close, you shoot the ones in front so the rest will stop and hesitate. Stationary targets are always easier to hit. Repeat process until no targets remain standing.
Should their accuracy begin to get close, call in bigger guns (or close air support) on their position and repeat the process until no targets remain standing.
Always understand that if you die were splitting up your gear so keep it clean
and orderly.
When in doubt on what to bring, bring water, guns, ammo and grenades everything else you'll need will be lying around after the first five minutes.
Amen brother 

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Well said by all. One more on the importance of accuracy over speed. You can't miss fast enough to win a gunfight.
Great stuff, some old familiar ones (from my Infantry days) and some new ones.
DaveM 2008-03-11 14:23:45

Lifetime Member #116
Dave's '82
[QUOTE=Adams' Apple] "Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on 'pucker factor' than the inherent accuracy of the gun"[/QUOTE]
"pucker factor" isn't this someting that happens when your cell mate named Bubba, gives you a come
hither look????????????
(fixed quote box)Adams' Apple 2008-03-13 10:37:45
"pucker factor" isn't this someting that happens when your cell mate named Bubba, gives you a come

(fixed quote box)
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in Forum: Humor
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