Topic: Is it cold out there?
in Forum: Humor
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This mornig when I went out for my walk with Bailey, our Golden Retreiver, the air temperature was -13. There was a pretty stiff breeze out of the northwest which put the wind chill factor down in the -35 area. That's just a tad bit chilly even by Minnesota standards.
This afternoon I opened up an e-mail from a teacher friend in Wisconsin which brought a chuckle so I thought I'd share the contents with everyone.
Subject: Is it cold out there?
(There is actually some truth to this... especially the very last one...)
60 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.
50 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People go to the beaches on Lake Superior to sunbathe.
People go to the beaches on Lake Superior to sunbathe.
40 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.
32 above zero:
Distilled water freezes.
The water in Hayward (in northern Wisconsin) gets thicker.
20 above zero:
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.
15 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.
Zero:
People in Miami all die.
People in Wisconsin close the windows.
10 below zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico
People in Wisconsin get out their winter coats.
25 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.
40 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.
100 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Wisconsinites get upset because they can't start the Mini-Van.
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Wisconsinites get upset because they can't start the Mini-Van.
460 below zero:
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.)
People in Wisconsin start saying..."Cold 'nuff fer ya?"
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.)
People in Wisconsin start saying..."Cold 'nuff fer ya?"
500 below zero:
he!! freezes over.
Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late.
Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late.
Jim Olson 
"The Toys"...!!! Save the Wave! 
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"Is it cold 'nuff fer ya?"
"NO...just a LITTLE BIT colder will be jest PERFECT!"
If it gets below 70 here I'm looking for a jacket!
I don't envy, or feel sorry for youse northern guys! Cold sux!! It's in the high 50s here...BBBRRRRRRRR!!!!
"NO...just a LITTLE BIT colder will be jest PERFECT!"
If it gets below 70 here I'm looking for a jacket!
I don't envy, or feel sorry for youse northern guys! Cold sux!! It's in the high 50s here...BBBRRRRRRRR!!!!
Joel Adams
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It's pretty cold here in Michigan about 4 deg. with a good wind so we are in the -10s. I took the dog out to take a leak and she froze in mid-stream. Tapped on her and managed to break her off and take inside to thaw out.
Going to Ft. Meyers Tue-Thur to warm up. Might go swimming but I will have to watch out for shrinkage.
I am working on a new project; embedding images sub-surface onto metal tags. Pretty cool stuff.
Well they say the weather pattern is changing, I'll stay here in Alaska, looking at what you guys are going though maybe by next December I can plant the summer garden here. It is warming, this winter has been the mildest with more snow, a record..
Don't move to Texas, Glaciers will form next year when they slow down the speed limits on the Interstate..
Don't move to Texas, Glaciers will form next year when they slow down the speed limits on the Interstate..
"I Love all Corvettes! LifeTime Member #60..Terry" 
It was so nice here today i just had to get out and do some long overdue yard work.
Hey Jim I got a friend here for Bailey, heres my Frisco
MARK
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"Keep up the Pace"
I had no idea what cold was until on business one year, in the middle of January, I had to go to Wisconsin. When I left L.A. it was like 70 degrees. When I landed in Milw. it was 6 degress below zero, and that was the high for day! Being from California, I'm thinking, "how cold can it really be?" well, I found out real quick. It was soo cold, I could'nt get into the car I rented because the doorlocks were frozen solid, and that was indoors. Needless to say, I froze my a&$ off. Don't know how you guys survive up there, but hat's off to those who do !
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-2 here right now wind chill -24 with a high expected to be 24. Gonna be a cold walk to work today... BBBRRRR. 
Tuxblacray 2007-02-05 19:38:55
in Forum: Humor
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