Topic: More Blondes
in Forum: Humor
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A friend told the blond: "Christmas is on a Friday this year."
The blond then said, "Let's hope it's not the 13th."
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Two blonds find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station.
One asked: "What if one explodes before we get there?"
The other says: "We'll lie and say we only found two."
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A woman phoned her blond neighbor and said: "Close your curtains the next time you & your husband are having sex. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday."To which the blond replied: "Well, the joke's on all of you because I wasn't even at home yesterday."
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A blond is in the bathroom and her husband shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?" She answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine."
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A blond goes to the vet with her goldfish. "I think it's got epilepsy," she tells the vet. The vet takes a look and says, "It seems calm enough to me." The blonde says, "Wait, I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet."
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A blond spies a letter lying on her doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND." She spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.
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A blond man shouts frantically into the phone "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" asks the Doctor. "No," he shouts, "this is her husband!"
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A blond was driving home, drunk as a skunk. Suddenly she has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another, then another. A cop car pulls her over, so she tells the cop about all the trees in the road. The cop says, "That's your air freshener swinging about!"
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A blond is in jail.. Guard looks in her cell and sees her hanging by her feet. "Just WHAT are you doing?" he asks. "Hanging myself," the blond replies. "It should be around your neck," says the guard. "I tried that," she replies, "but then I couldn't breathe."
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(This one actually makes sense...sort of...)
An Italian tourist asks a blond: "Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?"To which the blonde replies: "If they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat."
The difference between men and boys is the cost of their toys!!
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Three blonds walk into a bar.....
you'd think at least ONE of them would have seen it.....
you'd think at least ONE of them would have seen it.....
Joel Adams
C3VR Lifetime Member #56 
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I'm going to get Tux after yuse guys...............
corvette440hp
Lifetime MemberModerator
Duncanville, TX - USA
Joined: 11/8/2003
Posts: 20214
Vette(s): #1-1974 L-48 4spd Cp Med Red Metallic/Black deluxe int w/AC/tilt/tele./p/w-p/b/
Am-Fm/map light National/Regional/Chapter NCRS "Top Flight"
#2-1985 Bright Red/Carmine Cp.L-98/auto
Member: NCRS, NCRS Texas, Corvette Legends of Texas
"Oh wow...that's terrifying...."
Joel Adams
C3VR Lifetime Member #56
My Link
(click for Texas-sized view!) NCRS
"Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comforting to cry in a CORVETTE than in a Kia"
in Forum: Humor
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