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Topic: No sex since 1955

in Forum: Humor


No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 6:17am Message 1 of 11
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Roseland, NJ - USA
Joined: 12/4/2003
Posts: 966
Vette(s): 1974, 454 with 4 on the floor, matching numbers.
Subject: NO SEX SINCE 1955 
 
A crusty old Army Ranger found himself at a gala event hosted by a > local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young > idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant > Major for conversation. 
 
"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is > something bothering you?" 
 
"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature." 
 
"The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It > looks like you have seen a lot of action." 
 
"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action." 
 
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, 
 
"You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself." 
 
The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. 
 
Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the > wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?" 
 
"1955, ma'am." 
 
"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking > everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand > and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him > several times. 
 
Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and > said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!" 
 
The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his serious voice, 
 
"I hope not, it's only 2130 now." 
 
 
   
 
Don't ya just love military time?




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No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 6:31am Message 2 of 11
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No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 7:23am Message 3 of 11
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Two good ones warbird!!   


No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 8:35am Message 4 of 11
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Flanders, NJ - USA
Joined: 1/27/2004
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Vette(s): 1982 Black, ZZ4, Hooker Side Pipes, 3.55 Rear, Rebuilt & upgraded 700R4, All new suspension, brakes, & new Charcoal interior.
Very good Cookie ClapClap


 

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No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 9:38am Message 5 of 11
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visalia, CA - USA
Joined: 10/27/2006
Posts: 641
Vette(s): 1981 red with silver interior,350(L-81), 350TH, glass t-tops, aluminium rims, 1980 Black/ Black int., 350 GM crate engine/350TH, 1976 black/ saddle int., L-82 w/headers, holly carb, Hypertech ignition
thats a good one !!!!LOL


No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 2:25pm Message 6 of 11
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North Charleston, SC - USA
Joined: 3/20/2004
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Now that's a good one!

Thanks,

Scott



No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/21/07 5:57pm Message 7 of 11
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Fox Island, WA - USA
Joined: 6/20/2005
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Vette(s): 1978 Indy Pace Car 4851 of 6502, Auto, L-48
LOL Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing  Thats just freakin Hilliarious LOL


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No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/22/07 5:53am Message 8 of 11
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HOWELL, NJ - USA
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HOOAH!!!!!  And soldiers and the sun rise at O-dark-30,  Chow-time occurs 3 times a day, and lights-out is when the sun goes down!!!Tongue


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No sex since 1955

Posted: 9/22/07 12:47pm Message 9 of 11
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No sex since 1955

Posted: 10/3/07 9:29am Message 10 of 11
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The sailor replied 3 bells and didn't get anything.


 
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in Forum: Humor


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