evening when an ancient cow loomed in front of the car. The driver tried

to

avoid it but couldn't - the aged bovine was struck and killed.

Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the

owners

what had happened. She stayed in the car making phone calls to

lobbyists.

About an hour later the driver staggered back to the car with his

clothes

in disarray. He was holding a half empty bottle of expensive wine in one

hand, a rare, huge Cuban cigar in the other, and was smiling happily,

smeared with lipstick.

"What happened to you," asked Hillary?

"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the cigar, his wife gave

me

the wine, and their beautiful twin daughters made mad passionate love to

me."

"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.

The driver replied, "I just stepped inside the door and said, I'm

Hillary

Clinton's driver and I've just killed the old cow. The rest happened so

fast I couldn't stop it."