At last a guy has taken the Time to write this all down.

             Finally, the guys' side of the story.
             (I must admit, it's pretty good.)

             We always hear "the rules"
             From the female side.

             Now here are the rules from the male side.
             These are our rules!
             Please note...
             These are all numbered "1"
             ON PURPOSE!

             1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
             You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
             We need it up, you need it down.
             You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

             1. Sunday sports.
             It's like the full moon
             Or the changing of the tides.
             Let it be.

             1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
             And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

             1. Crying is blackmail.

             1. Ask for what you want.
             Let us be clear on this one:
             Subtle hints do not work!
             Strong hints do not work!
             Obvious hints do not work!
             Just say it!

             1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost
every question.


             1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving
it.
             That's what we do.
             Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


             1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
             See a doctor.

             1. Anything we said 6 months ago ! Is inadmissible in an
argument.
             In fact, all comments become
             Null and void after 7 days.

             1. If you won't dress like the
             Victoria's Secret girls,
             Don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.


             1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
             Don't ask us.


             1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
             And one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
other one.


             1. You can either ask us to do something
             Or tell us how you want it done.
             Not both.
             If you already know best how to do it,
             Just do it yourself.


             1. Whenever possible,
             Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


             1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither
do we.


             1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default
settings.
             Peach, for example,
             Is a fruit, not a color.
             Pumpkin is also a fruit.
             We have no idea what mauve is.

             1 If it itches, it will be scratched.
             We do that.


             1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
             We will act like nothing's wrong.
             We know you are lying,
             But it is just not worth the hassle.


             1. If you ask a question you don't
             Want an answer to,
             Expect an answer you don't want to hear.


             1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you
wear is fine...Really.


             1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as
             Computers, the Car Repair, or Cigar Smoking.


             1. You have enough clothes.


             1. You have too many shoes.


             1. I am in shape.
             Round is a shape.


             1. Thank you for reading this.
             Yes, I know,
             I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
             But did you know men really don't mind that?
             It's like camping.

"Women's faults are many,
Men have only two.
Everything we say,
and everything we do"

would love to print this and place on the refrigerator but that would probably put me on the couch. what do you think?

I have seen this before, and it's still just as good and true.  Howard, go ahead and post it.  Like it says, sleeping on the couch is like camping out. 

        

 

Jest don't try to deduct for "Moving Expenses" with the IRS!!!

Your right if you post this on the fridge you may hafta sleep on the couch. It,s definately not the same as campin though. If it is the world is at might feet right now since I am sittin by the campfire with my lap top...

I smile every time I see this.

I wish I had that rule book when I got married.

single guys should carry a copy in their wallet for handy reference.

If I posted that on the fridge I'd most likely end up living either in the rafters of the garage or my truck.  Definitely would not be able to sleep on the couch OR in the barn with the ponies...!!!