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Topic: The Honest Mortician

in Forum: Humor


The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/20/07 5:43pm Message 1 of 11
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Irving, TX - USA
Joined: 8/21/2004
Posts: 4273
Vette(s): #1 -1969 Corvette Coupe Riverside Gold, black interior,MN,A/C,350/350,PS,PB,window cranks. #2 -2000 C5, black/black, 6 sp, Bose system & lots of buttons.
 

The Honest Mortician

 

A man who just died is delivered to the mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.

 

The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the mortician a blank check and says, "I don't care what it costs, please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing." The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly. She says to the mortician, "Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?" To her astonishment, the mortician presents her with the blank check." There's no charge," he says.

 

"No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!" she says.

 

"Honestly, ma'am," the mortician says, "It cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice. So I switched the heads."




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The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/20/07 6:11pm Message 2 of 11
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Duncanville, TX - USA
Joined: 11/8/2003
Posts: 20214
Vette(s): #1-1974 L-48 4spd Cp Med Red Metallic/Black deluxe int w/AC/tilt/tele./p/w-p/b/ Am-Fm/map light National/Regional/Chapter NCRS "Top Flight" #2-1985 Bright Red/Carmine Cp.L-98/auto Member: NCRS, NCRS Texas, Corvette Legends of Texas
That's just RONG!!!


Joel Adams
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"Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comforting to cry in a CORVETTE than in a Kia"

The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/20/07 6:55pm Message 3 of 11
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Syracuse, NY - USA
Joined: 8/1/2003
Posts: 693
Vette(s): ...
LOLLOLBig%20smileCryClap
LOL


The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/20/07 8:10pm Message 4 of 11
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North Charleston, SC - USA
Joined: 3/20/2004
Posts: 4176
Vette(s): 1975 L48 AT AC T-top
Awesome!

Scott



The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/21/07 9:22am Message 5 of 11
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Victor, NY - USA
Joined: 7/12/2004
Posts: 6841
Vette(s): 2004 Commemorative Edition Coupe, Auto w/HUD. 13K miles in 2015. Sold 1982 Red Coupe
Hey, what ever it takes for customer satisfaction.


 
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The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/21/07 2:07pm Message 6 of 11
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Manteca, CA - USA
Joined: 11/20/2005
Posts: 3623
Vette(s): 1978,two tone,Metalic Rootbeer & gold 1975 L48 4 speed
OH SURE, you can do it the easy way.....


The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/21/07 4:20pm Message 7 of 11
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Greensburg, IN - USA
Joined: 9/24/2003
Posts: 5189
Vette(s): Previous: 1984 Coupe, 1988 Maroon Coupe, 1989 Coupe, 2001 Roadster Present: 1967 Stingray Roadster, 1976 Stingray Coupe, 1989 Roadster..
Ah reckon that be one oh them thar outta body experiencez......Tuxblacray2007-08-21 16:20:25


The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/21/07 9:17pm Message 8 of 11
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visalia, CA - USA
Joined: 10/27/2006
Posts: 641
Vette(s): 1981 red with silver interior,350(L-81), 350TH, glass t-tops, aluminium rims, 1980 Black/ Black int., 350 GM crate engine/350TH, 1976 black/ saddle int., L-82 w/headers, holly carb, Hypertech ignition

EEEEEEW !..... THAT FREAKS ME OUT ...... BUT IT'S FUNNY LOL




The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/22/07 4:53am Message 9 of 11
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Spotsylvania, VA - USA
Joined: 1/20/2007
Posts: 293
Vette(s): 1977 Silver Coupe
Good Thang it wasn't a fat Guy and a skinny Guy.Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing


The Honest Mortician

Posted: 8/22/07 4:28pm Message 10 of 11
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Joined: 3/9/2006
Posts: 2168
Sick!!  I love it!!  Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing  Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing  Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing


in Forum: Humor


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