Take off clothing and place it in sectioned

laundry hamper according to lights and darks

.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any

exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -

make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg

cloth, long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage

shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint

conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub

for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and

jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and

towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any

exposed areas.

*How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the

bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at

her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your

butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water

rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the

shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and

surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs

stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair.  Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was

hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,

light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at

her and make the woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh

at the truth behind this, there is something so very

wrong with you.

Have a great day! And, "woo, woo" to you !!!