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Time for Puns & Coffee! (1/5)
 4/20/07 3:19pm
greypoupon69Lifetime Member
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Irving, TX - USA

Vette(s):
#1 -1969 Corvette Coupe Riverside Gold, black interior,MN,A/C,350/350,PS,PB,window cranks. #2 -2000 C5, black/black, 6 sp, Bose system & lots of buttons.


Joined: 8/21/2004
Posts: 4273

 

* I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit  me.

 * Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

 * Did you hear about the guy whose whole left  side was cut off?  He's all right now.

 * The roundest knight at  King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

 * To write with a  broken pencil is pointless.

 * When fish are in schools they  sometimes take debate.

 * The short fortune teller who escaped  from prison was a small medium at large.

 * A thief who stole a  calendar got twelve months.

 * A thief fell and broke his leg in  wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.

 * Thieves who steal  corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

 * We'll never  run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

 * When  the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.

 * The math professor  went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.

 * The  professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

 * The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

 * If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your  memory.

 * A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

 * What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway)

 * A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

 *  Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

 * A  backward poet writes inverse.

 * A  chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

 * With her marriage she  got a new name and a dress.

 * Show me a piano falling down a  mine shaft and I'll show you a  flat miner.

 * When a  clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

 * The guy who fell  onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

 * You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

 * He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

 * A calendar's days are numbered.

 * A lot of money  is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.

 * A boiled egg is  hard to beat.

 * He had a photographic memory which was never  developed.

 * A plateau is a high form of flattery.

 * When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

 * When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

 * Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

 * Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

 *  Acupuncture: a jab well done.

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Time for Puns & Coffee! (2/5)
 4/20/07 3:51pm
ranger3Lifetime Member
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North Charleston, SC - USA

Vette(s):
1975 L48 AT AC T-top


Joined: 3/20/2004
Posts: 4176

These are all very good. I really like the one about ded batteriesHug

Scott
Time for Puns & Coffee! (3/5)
 4/20/07 3:51pm
ranger3Lifetime Member
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North Charleston, SC - USA

Vette(s):
1975 L48 AT AC T-top


Joined: 3/20/2004
Posts: 4176


Time for Puns & Coffee! (4/5)
 4/21/07 5:08pm
aceintheholeLifetime Member
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Valley Springs, CA - USA

Vette(s):
1978,Metalic Money Green W/Gold emblems,TH350 w/gear splitter,black & grey interior.1978,two tone,Metalic Rootbeer & gold ,Doeskin interior,auto. trans. 1981, Silver w/mirrored T-Tops,4 spd, charcoal interior.


Joined: 11/20/2005
Posts: 3618

Someone must have given up thier adult life to think all those up. (I'm gonna forward it ). Clap

______________

Jimmy B.
Just can't wait to get on the road again.

 
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Time for Puns & Coffee! (5/5)
 4/21/07 5:21pm
lukesvetteLifetime Member
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HOWELL, NJ - USA

Vette(s):
1979, Targa Blue (72 Color), Pace Car rear spoiler, L88 hood, Dark blue factory interior, 525HP 406, HD 700R4, 370 gears,Steeroids, composite rear spring, TT IIs wrapped in T/A Radials.


Joined: 5/18/2004
Posts: 6810

I like the egg one - And that's no yolk!! Rolling%20On%20The%20Floor%20Laughing